Return to Me

She took a deep breath and looked up. She was calm yet distracted. She tried to block the negative thoughts silently overtaking her mind, “nothing will be different this time.” Then she thought about the first few words from the Old Testament, Ash Wednesday reading, “Even now, says the LORD, return to me with your whole heart.” (Joel 2:12) Determined to put faith over fear, she made a silent vow to try and follow this wise advice.

Lent is a time in the liturgical year when God invites all of his beloved children to return to an outpouring of His abundant love and mercy with a renewed zeal. It is a time to reflect on where we have strayed from God then search for a way back into a closer relationship with Him. But what if a person is feeling off and overwhelmed by life right now because of job stress, family issues, a sick family member, physical illness and so much more? What is someone supposed to do if she finds herself having absolutely no desire to pray or draw closer to God this Lent? I think in a situation like this we have to remind ourselves that we are not God—and that he understands and loves us exactly where we are. Then we have to shout out with courage that we need His help. Change takes time to unfold in a person’s life, even with the gift of God’s grace and goodness. During this time of desert loneliness, we must remember that God uses everything that happens to us to bring about a greater good—even the painful moments. We must be trusting and patient, allowing the Lord to convert our hurting hearts. When we return to Him, the same unchanging God who loves us overwhelmingly will meet us in the empty desert and lead us by the hand toward the light.

During these moments of struggle, I am reminded of wise advice once given to me by a dear family member—turn away from fear and don’t let it steal your joy. Fear attracts unwarranted negative thoughts and when we are feeling low, the evil one will try to infiltrate our lives in subtle ways so that we stay separated from the love of God. This author of lies will try to convince us that nobody cares about us, least of all God. He will try to make us feel lonely and afraid especially if we are enduring physical trials. He will do everything in his power to rob us of our faith when at the current moment we are experiencing little consolation from it. We must always recognize these temptations for what they are—lies which are not from God. These feelings can have no real power over us because God, who is Love itself, is always greater than any amount of fear. If you are in the desert now feeling this way, hold on tight to God’s love for you.

I would like to invite you this Lent to return to God with your whole heart. Recommit to the spiritual battle to live with Christ and not the enemy and author of lies who wants people to turn away from God. Our weapons for this worthwhile battle are prayer, fasting (from food or bad habits) and almsgiving (donations or service to those most in need). I will be walking with you in faith each day. And on the days when I find it challenging, I will be shouting out my need for God’s help, confident that He will come to my rescue in the midst of my desert loneliness. Then in forty days time, we will all celebrate the joy of Christ’s Resurrection together where sin, death and the evil one are defeated forever and the promise of eternal life is our gift.